I find it very interesting that everyone has such different views on what is a comfortable amount of money to spend on living expenses.
People who are fairly frugal are usually categorized as ramen-eating, penny pinching, student-like cheapos who don’t have any fun at all and are choking the fun out of their money.
E.g. Cooking at home or bringing their lunches to work are a couple of activities, every dollar is stretched and saved.
They see people who spend lots of money as wasteful, extravagant overspenders who try to consistently live above their means, totally unaware of what ‘normal’ living expenses are.
E.g. Thinking a million dollar home with 2 cars, a nanny, a gardener and a cleaner is “normal” for someone who is middle-class.
Which one is right?
Neither of course!
And they’re both shaming each others’ situations, safe in the thought that their way is the right way.
Really, it all boils down to what you consider to be essential expenses such as food, shelter and clothes.
Then it’s just a question of whether you buy a $5 shirt at Old Navy or a $5000 shirt from Saks Fifth Avenue with what you have.
(Neither option is “wrong” by the way depending on what you consider reasonable and what you can afford.)
I like to be somewhere in the middle
Fairly good with spending my money and making sure I don’t buy more than what I want or need, but also not feeling like I cannot buy what I want just because I want to save a dollar for a retirement 40 years away.
Pshaw!
I agree with spending AND saving as long as they’re reasonable with your lifestyle and what you can afford.
Take traveling for instance: people might think I’m off my rocker by wanting to spend $10,000 on a trip around Asia. They’d probably rather keep it, earn interest on it and have that security. Me, I want to enjoy it within reason, and I find $10,000 reasonable for visiting 7 cities and 3 countries.
The only 3 Golden Rules you have to keep in mind:
- Spend less than what you earn
- Be mindful of your spending
- Don’t get into unmanageable debt until/unless you have a plan
Rather than saying that either side is wrong for being too cheap and not “living life” or being too spendthrift and living life at the expense of your futures, just consider what you think is reasonable for your lifestyle and earnings, and stop the whining. No one has your situation, so don’t compare yourselves to anyone but yourselves.
Scale back, or scale up as you see fit and keep the 3 Golden Rules in mind.
Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver.
I cleared $60,000 in 18 months earning $65,000 gross/year.
Now I am self-employed, and you can read more about 
I don’t begrudge people for how they spend their money, but what does drive me crazy is hearing them complain that they can’t afford ________. In reality, they just haven’t made it a priority. Most of us can’t afford to have everything at once, all the time. They chose to spend on other things. Did you not pause long enough to figure out what you’d have to give up in exchange?
We take a major trip every year with our kids and plan to retire in our 50s. Those are our two priorities and we very consciously cut ALL other spending to the bare minimum in order to fund those two goals. We’re happy to do it because restaurants meals, new car smell and 400 channels just aren’t important to us. If those are the very things that make your life enjoyable, great, but please don’t spend on those things and then give me the “boy it must be nice to be able to afford that trip” speech. If travel is actually important to you then figure out what you can give up to have it.
THANK YOU for this! I actually do this sometimes (shaming peopel who I think overspend), but you’re absolutely right. Right on, right on. Neither side is necessarily correct, it’s all just a matter of what you think is important and what you’re comfy with! Your golden tips at the bottom though should definitely always be kept in mind, especially #1!
There definitely has to be a balance when it comes to spending / saving. What’s the point in saving every dollar if you can’t enjoy at least a few of them? I love your 3 Golden Rules – totally agree with all of them 🙂
I don’t find it easy to judge others, because everyone’s situation is different. Even your own personal spending is going to evolve over a lifetime. When I was younger, the date budget was big; now it’s non-existant (by child, not by choice). We also tend to go on less expensive vacations, because it costs so much more to take the same one’s we used to.
So true! Recently I was so excited for my teenage daughter – she had budgeted her money well, shopped clearance racks and gotten some fabulous jeans for $10 and a beautiful party dress for $12. We were sharing our ‘fortune’ with a notoriously frugal friend. She told us that she was happy for us, if we thought that $10 was a good price for jeans….really? We did think it was a good price and were thrilled – oh well. We are working hard to make the most of the income that we have but we want to be ‘in the middle’ as well. Thanks for the article!
That’s the main thing, spending less than what you earn ! I never spent extravagant amounts, but it was more than I could afford and that’s why my student loans are way higher than they should be. Great article.
You totally hit the nail on the head with this line ”
I agree with spending AND saving as long as they’re reasonable with your lifestyle and what you can afford.” I totally agree. Plus I had a friend who travelled around Asia for I think about 6 months and her budget was $10,000. That’s not a lot of money really if you think about it for living and traveling around and doing excursions for 6 months. Have fun on your trip, I hope to do a backpacking trip to Asia sometime soon too.