People borrow money for a variety of reasons. You may take out a loan to go to college, cover a medical emergency, or fund a weekend getaway.
I found myself in $25K of debt because I was impatient. And I suspect there are many others who’d rather not wait until they can pay cash for the things they want. After all, saving money takes time; it takes sacrifice.
Breaking the habit of mindless spending is painful. All that thinking about what you can afford, what you can’t afford, what you need, and what you don’t need is exhausting.
Still, if you want to defeat your internal give-it-to-me-now monster and blast away debt, you’ve got to change your attitude.
Accept that sacrifice is uncomfortable
A few weeks ago, I shared with you ten frugal habits that don’t bother me at all. However, some of the techniques I used to save money and get out of debt bugged me–they bugged me a lot.
- Taking a fifty minute bus ride to work. Instead of waiting outside during the frigid winter months, I could’ve hopped in my car and drove to work in half the time. As an added bonus, I wouldn’t have been subjected to the loud (and often ignorant) conversations of fellow passengers.
- Wearing clothes that were torn, pilling, or faded. No one has ever labeled me a fashionista, but I like to look good.
- Living with roommates. Let’s get one thing straight here: I don’t like people. Well, at least not when they start yakking as soon as I walk through the front door or when their presence prohibits me from lounging around in my undies.
I didn’t want to do any of those things, but I did them anyway. Why? Because it was necessary.
Appreciate what you already have
For one reason or another, we often feel like our lives are incomplete—that if we acquire the right trinkets all will be well. Usually, we’re wrong.
Some things you’re born with—loving parents, individual freedoms, gorgeous hair. Others you have to work for—a successful career, an amazing physique, a fabulous home.
Either way, you’ve got it; be grateful for it.
If you focus all of your energy on what you don’t have, you’ll fail to enjoy what you do have. You’ll get stuck in an endless cycle of longing and acquiring and never break free of burdensome debt.
Stop caring what other people think
Why siphon money away from the things you value to pay for something you couldn’t care less about?
Will Smith once said, “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” Wise words, indeed.
Look, you know what you want. Don’t distract yourself with what others want.
My 2007 Honda Civic could never replace Betsy (my banged up, death trap on wheels, 1995 Geo Prizm), but I like it.
When shopping for a vehicle, I look for fuel efficiency, reliability, and affordability. Well, what do you know! That’s exactly what I have. I’m happy. 😀
What’s important to a complete stranger or even a close friend doesn’t affect my car buying decision—not in the least.
If you dream of owning a $200K Bentley, find out how you can afford one. As for me, I’ll dedicate my resources to achieving my dreams.
Understand that major sacrifice is only temporary
Your “suffering” won’t last forever. If you’re disciplined, eventually, you’ll become debt free. So quit whining, why don’t you?
In order to obliterate $25K of debt in 12 months, I drastically cut my consumption. I’m not gonna lie; it was tough sometimes.
But I never planned on skipping my favorite restaurants forever. At some point, I’d update my wardrobe. And I knew a two-hour flight would replace the 16-hour train ride it took to visit my family. I recognized the journey to debt freedom wouldn’t last long.
After I achieved my goal, for the most part, life returned to normal.
Rethink what saving means
When people learn that I’m a personal finance blogger, they usually want me to share tricks on how to get the best discounts. I tell them to forget about that stuff. If you want to free up more cash, the solution is simple: stop spending it.
I know, it’s easier said than done. But here’s the thing, if you pay $400 for a television that normally retails for $1,000, you don’t save $600. You spend $400.
Skip the TV, and put the $400 toward your debt.
The same applies for concerts, clothes, whatever you can think of. Unless the item you buy is specifically for making more money or reducing expenses, its purchase will result in you having less money to repay loans.
Awesome post. I followed your blog here from another blog. I am the very definition of frugal and a minimalist. My boyfriend, on the other hand…wow…complete opposite. I just calculated that he spends over $500 at Starbucks in ONE MONTH. I’m looking for ways to help without overstepping my current bounds. As this gets far more serious…well…this is going to be far more serious. Anyway…some great tips here. thank you!
Hi Shawanda! Thanks for your post – it has really helped me think more about my £9000 personal loan, the anxiety it gives me and what ways I can pay it off sooner rather than later. I just want it to be done and dusted! At the moment, I have £400 to spare after payday each month once all expenses(including food) are paid to put towards the loan. It really feels like it will take such a long time to pay off the loan(and ideally, build up a 3 month emergency fund).
I feel as if this loan is causing me to miss out on opportunities to chase more interesting jobs or find jobs closer to where my parents and other family live(i.e. scared that the only jobs available may pay lower or have less security).
Right now, I’m locked into a rental lease for the 1-bedroom apartment I’m living in for another 3 months – as soon as that finishes, I’ll be able to move out and look for a place to share with roommates(or flatmates, as we call them over here in the UK), or choose to continue on living there on a rolling 2-month basis(i.e. I can move out anytime as long as I give 2 months notice).
Even the fanciest digs(e.g. a room in a modern apartment building with an en-suite) to share with another person is a lot cheaper than living alone and could give me an extra £250 to put towards my loan. If I were to look for something even less fancy(e.g. older buildings to share with at least 3 other people, no en-suite), I could have an extra £600 to £800 per month freed up.
Do you have any tips for someone who has gotten used to living alone for the last 2 years who is thinking about going back into sharehousing? I confess that out of all the money-saving methods, this really bugs me the most because I always thought that at my age(early 30s), I’d be too old for roommates/flatmates. I’ve lived with other people in many other sharehouses before for more than 3 years and have seen various past flatmates do some ridiculously inconsiderate things(e.g. steal food, be late on paying their share of the bills, not cleaning up after themselves, etc.).
Moving out of the 1-bedroom apartment seems like the fastest way to kill off the loan though. I’ve already cut down on other expenses such as shopping and going out(I’ve spent the better part of the last year just moping inside the apartment almost every weekend).
Would also love to hear from any other readers any advice or experiences they have had with living alone versus sharing with roommates to save money!
Over the years I’ve lived with many (no less than 10) different people. And honestly, I’ve gotten along with all of them. I’m still good friends with what was probably my worst roommate. She was really messy.
Maybe it’s just me, but as long as you’re reasonably clean, quiet, and give me my space, I’m cool with you. If possible, try to get a place where you’re not jointly responsible for the rent or even the utilities. Meaning, if your roommates pay their rent late, you’re not harmed by this.
Also, I pick my battles very carefully. I knew my messy roommate didn’t care about cleanliness. I did, so I cleaned up after her and myself. I wasn’t perfect either, and she didn’t give me a hard time about my shortcomings.
Ask your friends for roommate recommendations. I’d also lean toward older, working individuals. If they work a ton of hours or travel for business, even better. Take time to get to know prospective roommates before finalizing your decision. And don’t be afraid to right down a list of questions to ask potential roomies.
There are no guarantees a shared living arrangement will work out, but I think having the right attitude goes a long way.
Hi, Bernadette. Invest in headphones. Seriously. Even cheap earbuds. You can plug in, read your book/kindle/nook/whatever and get those few moments alone that you will really need.
I agree with Shawanda about picking your battles very carefully. I also agree about slightly older, fully employed roommates. No one is perfect, but responsible is VERY important. Good luck!!!
Inspiring post, Shawanda. I especially love this: “If you focus all of your energy on what you don’t have, you’ll fail to enjoy what you do have.” True words!
‘Stop thinking about what other people think’ is a fantastic piece of advice. I care too much and therefore feel the need to impress sometimes. Right now I basically wear the same 5 outfits every week. I think people notice but in reality people probably don’t care.
That’s awesome!! Good for you! The most important part for me is to remember that this sacrifice is only temporary. If I dont make the same mistakes again then I will only have to work like a gazelle once in my life.
Okay, I am going to offer this, what about carpooling? You ask for money or kick in for gas from fellow travelers?
I did ride the bus for years. The broken, no ac, no heat, bad smelling people, loud kids, conversations that really should be private, on a bus, not to mention occasional violence and lastly, probably someone other than the police carrying a gun, on the bus. Yeah, good times, good times, NOT. Your safety, emotional well being is worth more than the $!.25 per ride. If something does happen on a bus, aren’t you going to pay more (hospital, attorney, lost days of work..)?
We’re looking for a roommate right now – which I do NOT look forward to, but hey, it will help us pay down the debt. We’re also advertising to pet sit, babysit, house sit… as I said, not things I want to do, but extra cash pays down the debt faster. Plus we’ve cut several budget categories (entertainment, eating out) to free up money for extra payments.
Great tips. I also think that one of the best ways to pay off debt in a short period of time, other than saving and changing habits, is to actually MAKE more money.
One of the biggest reasons it’s so hard to pay off debt is the fact that most people simply don’t make enough. When you’re in debt, you’re actually at your most creative point. You’re motivated to think of ways to make more money and many side hustles are born at this point in people’s lives.