There are countless reasons to spend money you don’t have.
- You’re overly optimistic about your future earning potential.
- You don’t want to work hard for the money.
- You feed off instant gratification.
- You can’t pass up a good deal.
- You’re immature.
- You deserve it.
Stop right there! You deserve it, huh?
Let’s explore the soundness of that logic for a moment.
Recently, I performed an internet search for the phrase, “Why Americans don’t save.”
I’m curious to know why the average American saves less than 5% of their disposable income.
I expected a laundry list of factors such as the ones noted above. But that’s not what I found.
I stumbled upon a series of New York Times articles that dealt with this issue. To my surprise, many of the commenters on these articles blame lack of income for the “inability” to save.
According to the Financial Times, “the annual incomes of the bottom 90 per cent of US families have been essentially flat since 1973.”
But that’s no excuse, is it?
If you want to save more money and you truly don’t make enough to do so, then make more money.
Simple, yes?
Hmm. Maybe not.
It’s easy to forget about those who are born without the basics you take for granted.
Maybe you were equipped – through no doing of your own – with the tools that allow you to exponentially increase your income.
Maybe you’re not burdened with obligations that prohibit you from saving.
Maybe it was your environment or some innate gift that’s allowed you to excel in your career.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m a huge proponent of personal responsibility.
I’m not giving poor people a blanket pass to stay poor.
I’m just trying to punch a hole in that ego of yours that’s gotten so inflated you think you’re the sole author of your greatness.
You’re not!
Me telling you this is a good thing. It makes you more human.
You can thank me later.
Right now, you should thank the men and women who are responsible for the freedoms you enjoy on a daily basis.
You should thank your parents for the role – direct or indirect – they’ve played in helping you achieve your goals.
Heck, you should thank your lucky stars you were born in an industrialized nation.
For years, I’ve thought about how fortunate I am, but over the last few weeks, the extent to which I’ve been blessed has become clearer.
You see, I quit my job at the end of 2011.
Oh, how wonderful it felt to make the leap into entrepreneurship.
While I’m in the process of replacing the six-figure salary I walked away from, money is tight. I have my savings, but obviously, I want to cover my living expenses through current income.
Well, a couple weeks ago, a $50 payment entered my PayPal account in the morning. And in the evening, the $50 parking ticket that appeared on my car windshield ate it.
A similar incident happened a few days later. It’s very frustrating!
Now, I kind of know how the struggling underclass feels.
If I didn’t have the money, I’d have to pay for my necessities and leave the parking ticket unpaid (which would result in more severe financial penalties) or leave other bills unpaid (which could result in a collections account appearing on my credit report).
Ugh! I both love and hate that I understand – sort of – the frustrations of the poor.
I’m sure your life hasn’t been devoid of challenges. And I’d bet you’ve made relatively good decisions, but you can’t ignore the absense of severe disadvantages and setbacks that have permitted you to ascend to success without much disturbance.
We all have our demons, but compared to some, our lives have been a complete cakewalk.
One of my super conservative, pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps friends used to tell me the story of a young man who was able to overcome familial dysfunction. The guy’s mother was a drug abuser.
Because of her addiction, the mom didn’t allow for essentials in her budget such as, say, electricity.
Since it was too dark to see inside his home, the young man would study and complete his homework outside under the streetlights. He graduated high school and is now in college.
It’s a touching story, isn’t it?
Look at all of the wonderful things you can do in the face of seemingly insurmountable obstacles. But, boy is it tough.
Clearly, success (however you define it) isn’t impossible when your mother is an addict, but I imagine staying focused is a teensy bit more difficult.
As a child, could you resist the natural pull to either feel sorry for yourself or serve your natural desire to play with your friends all day or get into trouble while hanging out with a bunch of no do-gooders? I can’t say for sure how I would’ve been able to.
And unless you’ve experienced similar levels of adversity, you can’t either.
I’m sure you deserve a lot of things.
The right to the life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness is a good place to start. To acquire all of the luxurious toys and services your income can afford plus some? To go into debt? Not so much.
You shouldn’t feel guilty about your relatively privileged life. If nothing else, you should feel grateful. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you’re probably not as great as you think.
How much of your success is attributable to the sacrifices of loved ones, fellow countrymen, or strangers?
This piece was excellent — thank you — because I felt like you were saying what I have been wishing to say to more monied people most of my adult life. I love when folks say “Get a job” like that’s all there is to it. Um, I used to live out in the country, & my parents were less than helpful, so can anyone explain exactly how I was supposed to go about that endeavor? Couldn’t call a cab, cuz no money to pay. Couldn’t take the bus, cuz it didn’t come out where we lived. No one wanted to drive me around all afternoon picking up applications, & then doing it all over again another day to turn them in. Not to mention no wardrobe appropriate for job hunting & interviews. I’ve been told that I “should have” called a shelter to help me out, but as a just-recently-graduated 18-yr-old, I didn’t even know that was an option. All I knew was that college was out of the picture, working was next to impossible, & I was gonna be stuck with my parents for the rest of my life because I had no where else to go. So I enlisted in the military. Yeah, that was my “big” break. Now here I am with two fabulous kids, married to a wonderful man who brings home $1500 per month, half of which is our mortgage. It took me TEN YEARS to obtain a TWO-yr degree, one class at a time. And I can’t work because my entire (minimum wage) paycheck would go to childcare, so I might as well stay home, since we figure we can be broke with me working or broke with me home & it won’t make a difference either way financially but will be much better for our spirits if someone is around to do laundry while the other partner puts in 60-hr work weeks. And “get another job” makes me laugh. He’s already burnt out. No way am I pushing him back out the door to take on more. I’ve begun writing online but haven’t picked up any pay for it as of yet.
Sorry to go on about my plight; we really are a very happy family, but when someone starts talking finances & what we’re doing “wrong”, I get seriously annoyed. You addressed our life completely accurately, & I’m so glad others have more “luck” than we have had. We also recognize that our worst day is still better than much of the rest of the world, being that we live in the U.S.
To those who commented that the author was “talking down” at the poor, I’m speaking for the poor when I say, No — she wasn’t. She was advocating gratitude for those who aren’t poor. She was saying, Take a look at what you have & stop being so damn judgmental. She was saying, If your parents didn’t suck like mine did, & if you got to attend college & grab a career, & if you are able to feed & clothe your children with little worry about the electric getting shut off, then take a moment to count your lucky stars! 🙂
Oh Shawanda, how dare you! How dare you not allow me to feel sorry for myself. Here I was thinking, see she knows why I have no savings and no money because I was born into a poor “dysfunctional” family but then you not only use an example of a person who fought a greater challenge than I could imagine but also told me to be thankful. I was sooo ready to feel treat myself to something “I deserve” and spend my last $5 on some sort of junk food.
This was a great post. I love FB, and the fact that she was Canadian was why I continued to follow this blog, but money is money and I guess it doesn’t matter where you live if the reader can relate to the message.
Thanks Shawanda!
Thank you so much for this execptional post!!
I, too, really like the spirit of this post.
However- one slight gripe/disagreement that I have: I don’t actually think that you understand, even “kind of” the struggles of the poor. I think you “kind of” understand the struggles of perhaps a lower middle class individual?
Even in the US/Canada, I think that poor should really mean someone who is hovering near the poverty line, living absolutely paycheck to paycheck, with virtually no ability to save or put anything away.
I’m trying to get used to the change in “voice” on this blog and give you chance, so I’m going to comment on the spirit of the post and not the particulars… I agree that much of where you end up is due to circumstances beyond your control. I won the lottery in terms of birthplace: Canada-a developed nation with clean water, healthcare and women have rights. I also won the lottery in terms of parents-they were loving and supportive, made sure our needs were met, placed a focus on education, taught us how to set and acheive goals. I had access to education, I had healthcare and immunizations to keep me well, and I was blessed with some genetics/temperament that gave me the ability to excel at some of the skills that society/schools value.
I loathe when someone says, “if I can do it, you can do it” or gives an example of someone who has done well despite hard circumstances as the rationale that anyone should be able to. You don’t know the whole story, you can’t assume certain priveleges. I know I worked hard to get my advanced degree and do well in my field, but that came with a lot of advantages that others don’t have. I feel fortunate to have had these opportunities and appreciate that I should do all I can with them.
This rings true for a lot of things in my life and luckily, I have come out of that “I deserve it” or “I want this so I will buy it” phase. When I finally realized just how far my measly salary could take me, that’s when I snapped into reality. When I thought of the sacrifices my parents have made to send me to school and to keep me debt free, no words could describe how thankful I am and how I want to do the exact same for my future kids. I hate to say it to people but this is the truth. When I see my best friend buying everything on credit it makes me cringe. In the last week she has purchased a 55″ TV for $1300, an iPad 3, the new Naked Palette 2, and much more I probably don’t know about. They live paycheck to paycheck yet still complain that they don’t have money and they need to save. I just want to shake her and say “WELL STOP BUYING STUFF YOU DON’T NEED!” – she bought a new purse last week too and said she worked hard this year for it….well I guess!
Sorry my comment was too long haha
Your comment isn’t too long. Thanks for taking the time to leave one.
I’ve been hanging with some of my family members over the last few days, and I’m amazed at how frequently they spend money. I can go days with spending any money. When I’m out with them, they’re whipping out their wallets every couple hours. They’re constantly buying their kids crap they don’t need. None of said crap stays intact for more than 24 hours. I mean, what a waste! It’s so hard to watch.
I have been reading your blog for a while, and for the first time I feel I have to drop you a line and let you know that this post has you coming off like a pretentious and out of touch person. Your “relating” to the “underclass” seems condescending and unrealistic. Reminiscing about your salad days of six figure salaries makes your attempts at walking a mile in the shoes of the Americans struggling on non-living wages seem forced.
Did you read the entire blog post before leaving a comment?
Or did you decide the rest of the article wasn’t worth reading after I revealed I quit a six-figure job?
I tried to communicate that I don’t totally identify with poor people by emphasizing, i.e., italicizing, that I “kind of” and “sort of” understand their frustrations.
The point of the entire post was to point out how fortunate I and many others are. To point out how thankful we should be for the positive influences in our lives over which we’ve exercised no control. I don’t have to force trying to walk a mile in anyone’s shoes. I can carry on about my marry way blaming poor people for their circumstances. I can hold my head high and pretend that everything I’ve ever accomplished was because of MEEEE and nobody else. I don’t believe that, and for those who do, I tried to expose them to a different way of thinking.
Different person here; I did read the whole article, and I would agree with Orlandoinsane that your writing came off as pretentious, especially when indicating that you’ve dropped from your 6 figure income and are struggling, so you finally understand the working class that struggles with poverty (not your exact words, but that is the impression I got from your writing).
After taxes, I make around $28,000 a year ($1091 each 2 week pay). This doesn’t mean I am better or less than other people, and it doesn’t give me the right to talk down to people because of my income, but some of your writing came off that way (i.e. it was talking down at us, instead of trying to converse on an equal level).
You could still have this conversation reminding people they don’t in fact deserve something just because they work hard (we all deserve food, a safe place to live, etc), without coming across as quite so condescending.
I realize this is coming off as very critical – you raised some great points in this blog, but the tone of deliverance is what bothered me.
Love it. I find this so true.
I’m lucky, because I screwed up the first time around with education and
my family gave me the opportunity to turn it around. I couldn’t do it
without them, and I’m grateful for that. I possibly wouldn’t even be
alive today if it hadn’t been for Canada’s awesome health system and the
taxpayers who make it possible.
The truth of the matter is if you have food on your table, shelter, an education and a job you’re more privileged than most of the world’s population. Now that I look at it that way, I don’t see why people feel the desire to get stuff that doesn’t take care of their basic needs at any cost. If you can afford it and you budget for it without using credit, whatever. It’s your money. Otherwise, you don’t need it and can’t afford it so don’t get it.
I’m glad you enjoyed it! I really do think about how fortunate I am all the time. The first thing is being born in the United States and not the land of my ancestors. I’m not exactly sure where that would’ve been, but more likely than not, it’d be some impoverished, war torn country, where women have few, if any, rights. That gives me a big boost right there. Secondly, my parents were amazing. I have very few complaints about my upbringing.
Great post! My dad says “I deserve it” so much more than he should and then constantly complains about not having money. I’ve found myself saying it too and I’m trying to use him as an example of what not to do. Thank you for the reminder!
Another one of my personal faves is, “I work hard.” It’s particularly amusing coming from people who don’t work very hard.