Don’t make empty promises

What I hate the most is empty promises.

Such as from the following phrases:

We should talk sometime.

Let’s do this again sometime.

Sounds like a great idea, and I’ll definitely follow up on it sometime.

We must do coffee sometime.

I know it might seem like you’re trying to be friendly, open and nice… but it’s annoying and dare I say, disrespectful.

You aren’t being friendly to me when you say that.

You’re telling me:

You aren’t worth the time and the breath to set up a real meeting, appointment, or whatever with.

This is really just a way to tell you that if you really want to meet me, you’ll have to chase me, because I am not going to bother trying.

When I read or hear any of those above sentences, that end with “sometime” for the most part, I know the person doesn’t mean it.

The addition of “sometime” at the end, is just a socially acceptable brushoff.

Sometimes (*grin*), you don’t even need to hear the sometime: “We should talk.” … is also a brushoff when there isn’t an action to follow through on that empty promise.

If you want to talk, you do it now, or you set up a date in the future to do it, and you say:

We should talk sometime. How about next week?

We should meet up sometime. How do your next few weeks look like?


We should get together for a coffee the next time I’m in town. I’ll give you a call/email.

Ah hah!

There. A set date, a set time, and real commitment.

In emails, in real life, on the telephone.

Don’t say you’re going to want to do something, or want to talk to somebody, if you are just going to brush it off with a “sometime” at the end.

Either say that you want to do something, and then set up a date and time.

Or don’t say anything at all.

The only other time it could be acceptable, is if you say: We should meet up sometime for coffee.

and then you take the initiative to call or email them to actually do that. But if you just leave it hanging as a “gee who is going to contact who?” you might as well not say anything at all.

About the Author

Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver. I cleared $60,000 in 18 months earning $65,000 gross/year. Now I am self-employed, and you can read more about my story here, or visit my other blog: The Everyday Minimalist.