I really don’t believe it’s all biological or that men are pigs.
That’s a lot of hogwash! (Get it? Get it?… Never mind.)
It’s just a question of circumstance, opportunity and attitude.
Plenty of women cheat. Just as much as men, I’d wager.
So here are my three vague theories about why it seems like men cheat more than women.
1. Generally more men are successful than women.
Hang on.
Don’t get your panties in a twist just yet.
Read the whole paragraph before going straight to the comments and ranting.
We have the infamous glass ceiling.
Women typically make less money than men, and get passed over for more executive promotions than men because of the fact that they’re the ones who get pregnant and give birth to babies.
That’s it.
That’s the only major difference between men and women in the workplace — maternity leave.
As a side note, great solution would be to implement mandatory paternity leave so it evens out the playing field.
For that reason, it is why men are generally more successful than women.
Which means, they are also usually the gender that is under the most scrutiny from the media and it SEEMS as though more men cheat than women.
2. Women in the relationship seem to be mistresses most of the time.
It really seems as though in many of the cases of women coming forward and saying that she slept with so-and-so, she is a single woman (or escort) with no boyfriend or husband.
It never seems to be a married woman with kids who risked it all to be with a politician or famous celebrity.
Those famous men are generally always married with/without kids and just simply have more to lose.
3. Men seem to be intimidated by famous, successful women.
Which means, that average men don’t approach said women.
And the chances of a married woman celebrity cheating on her husband is quite low as a result.
If they see a sexy celebrity across the way, most Average Joes are not going to go up and start whispering sexy sweet nothings in her ear.
They’re thinking: What the heck do I have to offer to her? She’s rich, famous, beautiful AND smart. I have nothing she wants.
The opposite is true with women approaching men.
Those women know they have the beauty and body that those men are craving for, and perhaps a slight biological need to spread the seed around, kicks into place.
A man with lots of women throwing themselves at him, is a happy man. He’ll take any of them.
And a woman, with lots of men after her, is a happy woman… but seeing as she has the “power” in these relationships, will only pick the best of the lot, and secure her choice.
More strategic, I think.
So those are my three hare-brained theories about why it SEEMS as though men cheat on women more.
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I have researched on the internet and statistics showed me more men cheat. I dont think either one is better at cheating,I think that is just an excuse men have came up with to try to make it seem equal or that more women probably cheat. I have heard men have a nattural desire to want multiple women, just look at the Bible-King Soloman had 1000 women! Which is crazy in my opinion.
Also society makes it seem like the more women a man gets, the better reputation he gets,but the more men a woman sleeps with, the more of a whore she is. Like a woman can sleep with alot of men and be a whore, but a man is never considered a whore.(but in my opinion both men and women can be whores.
hmm it seems to me that both sexes cheat, some stats say that women cheat more, and I read a stat a few months ago that said that women file for divorce 1/3 of the time in marriages, meaning they file for divorce more. To be honest with you I don't want to date someone who is too successful, yea my guy is a programmer and he makes good money and I'm happy for him, but I just wouldn't want to date some actor or CEO.
Those types of guys know they can lose the love of their life and still end up with someone in old age, such as Brad Pitt. Guys at the top cheat more because they are tempted more when they have success, plus its an ego thing, of "oh well if she leaves me I can find someone else, the women are endless…."
I know it happens with women too, famous women have many divorces, but yea I don't want to date someone too successful. Then again when you think about it many famous actors marry other actors, business men marry other business women, I think some people at the top realize it for what it is and want someone who is their equal and understands.
Like Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis, some people at the top are very smart, and seem to choose someone they really want to be with in the long term. But still I don't want someone who is just too successful. I'm very insecure about that, we all have our insecurities. If I were a famous actress, I wouldn't date actors.
I don't think men cheat MORE than women. I think men are dumb and get caught more often.
It’s ego – a man is more likely to keep it quiet if his spouse or girlfriend cheats on him because the assumption is that if the person is cheating it is because they are not happy at home – that does not reflect well on a man’s ego. Moreover women more inclined to be discrete because on either side of the equation they stand to face more public censure and or negative scrutiny. If hubby/BF cheats – she was not doing her job at home – he was not satisfied. If she cheats – she did the man wrong – ungrateful, gold digger, home wrecker etc. It is a no win situation – save for the recent mistresses who are getting numerous 15 minutes of fame from telling tales. The only women who are wining at the cheating game; save for the wife who sued the mistress and won millions are the mistresses.
Women are just more discreet than men.
Haha. I love this post. But I'm not sure I can add any insight to any of it.
I'm just taking notes.
I have been thinking and talking about this especially in relation to the famous cheaters. My theory is that these men are huge risk-takers. They must be to take the risks they do in their everyday lives whether in politics or sports. Also, they have very large egos. Again, this relates first to career. Can you imagine the ego it requires to think "People would vote for me!" Add yes-men and success at an early age, and voila !
Perhaps it IS an ego thing.
Like “I am so invincible, I can take on anything!”
I've always heard it as simple biology. Females want a partner who can take care of the children & protect the, whereas males try to spread their seed around as much as possible.
I don't know if men actually cheat with more women, or if it's just published or noted more often when it's men doing the cheating.
Some many factors contribute to cheating insecurity ( as you mentioned above), living apart for so long because of movie roles, the belief that the grass is always greener or comparing their girlfriends or wives to other women instead of accepting and working on what they have already. There are some good and confident men out there though.
Our society has made it "cool" for men cheat, therefore it has become tolerated and we see it everywhere.
I'd like to think that when women cheat they are smart enought to not get caught
Well, yeah you can argue convenience/availability. Or even the biological imperative, like some folks do. Though most guys are shocked to find out I've never cheated. So clearly there are a lot of women cheats around.
My theory may be that the alleged disparity is more about reporting. Women can decry a cheater to the heavens and get sympathy. But some guys might feel a little awkward about admitting it. Like maybe they weren't enough (or at least maybe others will think that)? So it may just not be as talked about when women cheat on men.
Just at hought.
Perhaps another theory is that men only GET CAUGHT MORE than women, and women are better at keeping the secret? 😉
I believe woman cheat much more than men.
I believe in this day and age many women cheat but are a lot more cautious about it. And it's rare that the man (assuming we are discussing hetero relationships for arguments sake) she is cheating with will try to sabotage it by going to the husband or partner she is with. This fact alone will help keep the secret.
How many times has a mistress threatened to go to the cheating guy's wife? Not all of them, but probably a healthy handful so I think it's that men just get caught more often than women. Men generally like to brag about conquests to friends but women would probably not even tell her closest friend if this was happening. The chances of the secret being kept by a woman are greater, just from what I've seen/read/heard.
I have seen an increase in women's cheating over the years, cheating in general which is the reason we are seeing a lot of non-monogamy articles pop up in the media in the past few years. I think monogamy (which didn't really exist before Christianity) is starting to be questioned by a lot of people, rightfully so. Even a few famous Hollywood couples have outed themselves as being openly non-monogamous. Monogamy may not be suited for most of us considering all the changes in society and the world becoming a lot smaller. We also live longer and we have different needs than we did even just 50 years ago.
All this being said, cheating happens with both sexes and there are probably a lot more women doing it than we can ever imagine. They just never get caught 😀
I think women are better at cheating. The simple truth is men just get caught more. I feel they get cuaght for 3 main reasons:
1. If a woman has something to lose, she will rarely leave a paper trail.
2. A woman will either end the affair in a very blame-free way – i.e. start doing things to make the man think ending the affiar was her fault; or it won't end at all.
3. Women also tend to cheat with men who have somethign to lose so exposure is not in either parties' best interest
100% AGREE!!! i have this debate all the time all my girl friends always complain about "All men being cheater" But i totally agree with this…and the small fact that women are unfortunately better at hiding things. And do not get caught.
I read somewhere that men have a biological urge to spread their seed as widely as possible, in order to ensure their line continues. That woman tend to marry men who will be good husbands and fathers, ie slightly less heroic and more boring types, but that they'll cheat with the good looking well built (healthy looking) hero to ensure healthy babies. Sounds terrible, doesn't it?
I've been hearing more and more women cheating on their partner. But I do agree that most of the time, it's the men. For some men, money & power get into their head; they think they can do whatever they want.
You forgot another one. Women are less likely to get caught cheating! 😛
I actually think the reason for women's lack of success in the workplace goes far beyond maternity leave: its a matter of relationships. A lot of executives made it into the C suite not only because of their talent, but because they knew somebody. Women aren't able to go out for drinks/cigars/golfing, because of men think (and sometimes rightly so) that women aren't interested in those activities. In her autobiography, Carly Fiorina (the first female CEO of a fortune 500 Company, HP,) describes how her colleagues literally went to a strip club with a client, and she went along so she wouldn't miss out on the opportunity. Very few women would do something that degrading, but if your ambition is on overdrive, you'll do it.
As for your last point, don't forget about famous successful women that cheat with famous successful men, a la LeAnn Rhimes. In that case, LeAnn wasn't just a mistress, Dean was also a MANTRESS (what do you call the "other man?")