This article was kindly sent over to me from Michelle wh
o writes a blog called “The Diary of a Fatty“.
Thanks Michelle!
Now, on to the article. Written by The Sun, the title basically says that women have to wake up, smell the proverbial roses and get money wise. Read the entire article here.
I wanted to highlight the top 10 points in this article that jumped out at me:
1. Don’t wait for Prince Charming. He isn’t coming.
2. Taking charge of your finances will make you feel more in control, rather than less, even if you’re in a bad situation.
3. Don’t leave everything up to your spouse to handle. At the very least, know where it’s going.
4. Leave and put your own savings and investments in your own name.
5. Divorce rates are over 50%. There’s a high possibility that you will not stay together for the long run.
6. Talk about your finances with your significant other before settling down. If they’re skittish about it, then leave.
7. Your significant other may not know everything. 2 heads are better than one.
8. Pass on your financial wisdom to your daughters and empower them.
9. Don’t give up your career, education or aspirations for a real, or budding potential relationship. It isn’t worth it.
10. There are no guarantees in life. Even if you get a Prince Charming, something may happen – divorce, death, unfortunate circumstances can never be foreseen.
So there you have it ladies! Read the entire article here.
This advice could never be more right! Whats strange is that my father taught me alot of those points my whole life and I’m just not starting to realize the importance of them.
The best advice my mom EVER gave me… “I don’t care what you do as long as you alone can support yourself. (and it needs to be legal.)”
So, this was a pretty heavy load to carry at the age of 12… but the more I heard it the more empowered I was. I owned my own home, wiped out nearly all my debt, and bought a car before I turned 22. Now that I’m married I handle most of our finances, and it empowers me to know that if left up to my own devices I could still live on my own.
If I ever have kids, I will be sure to pass along the same advice!
Missy: I worry for girls like that only because I want them to really understand THEIR money. Even if they don’t handle it every day, know what bills to pay, when and in what amounts.
flirty*: I did find her advice to be a bit harsh and hypocritical, but I think the main points are good.
Mittsie: LOL!.. Monkeys. Gotta love them.
K-Money: I agree with that — to be the man your mother wanted you to marry. I guess I’ve subconsciously always been that way.
A girl friend told me if I was a man, she’d marry me. LOL
Big City: And it’s not to say to avoid dependence completely, but to at least be open to taking care of yourself.
Ashley: I’m the same way. I love numbers 🙂 And seeing analysis.
Steve: Sorry, just got back 🙂 Am on the way.
Mentally: I agree with the prenup as well, even if it isn’t romantic. But love, romance and kisses are not the same as marriage. I could go on forever about this LOL!
Amen! I need to send this article over to my dad!
I come from a very old-fashioned family. My younger sister is already married with two kids and my younger brother is engaged. Because I’m neither and working on my career goals prior to settling down, my dad has picked up the notion that I’m a lesbian and just afraid to tell them. Well, as I’ve tried to explain on many occasions, I’m not. I just think that I need to be financially secure and settled for myself rather than having to rely on someone else to take care of me.
As a side note, I’d also add to that list they came up with, get yourself a pre-nup. I know they’re not very romantic, but you need to protect yourself in any way possible. I have plenty of female clients at the credit union who are paying alimony and child support because they have the better job…and the exes are MILKING it for all it’s worth.
Kristy
http://www.masteryourcard.com/blog
these are great points. even as a guy i can take my own version of advice from this and prosper! thanks again for another awesome post! when you get a chance, come on over to the fluxlife blog and give us a follow back (we’re one of your followers here), we’d appreciate it! thanks in advance!
-Steve @ fluxlife
I already do all these things, but I know women who aren’t that money wise. I’m working on a post about women who want the whole traditional (in terms of gender roles) type marriage but marry men who aren’t providers. One of my friends is about to end up in divorce court cause her husband lost his job and she had to go back to work to keep them afloat. She is angry and bitter over the situation but any one of us could have told you that her husband can’t provide for a family on his own. He doesn’t have a degree or marketable skills, somehow he landed a high paying job for a few years. He’s a nice guy, but the kind of guy whose wife will have to work too to raise a family.
you’re so right. better to take control of your own finances yourself instead of assuming someone else knows better than you. easily done though…
Psssh. I handle ALL the finances in our relationship.
🙂 (Even though I secretly dream of not having to work, I still would create the budget and pay the bills and crunch the numbers! I love it!)
Do that many women really feel that way about money? Ugh! I am incredulous. How awful.
“Be the man your mother wanted you to marry”. Ha ha, I love that! I am that (mostly)!
DAMN STRAIGHT! I love that.
… well, after I read the topic again & saw that it said "money" & not "monkey". o_O.
Geez she sure starts off with mixed messaging. I get that she means we need to be independent, and I totally agree, but she also says we should be buying our own diamonds… why isn’t she saying we should have fiscal restraint to meet our goals? In an age of overspending on credit, she might want to watch her words. How many people do you know that buy diamonds with cash? How about talking about learning needs vs wants? That if you want it all, you’re gonna have to work for it all.
I do appreciate some of her advice. I agree absolutely, never give up your career or aspirations for a man with money. My boyfriend and I want to live together, which requires me to move across the country, because his job is better than mine and I’m willing to admit that. I am going to, but I’m not doing it until I find a job there in my field which will let me continue pursuing my goals. This is a bit hard, but I can’t be dependent on him for money. Its just not in my DNA. And I think if you give up your dreams, it breeds resentment over the long term.
I don’t agree with her flat out statement that if a man won’t talk – run. Sure, if he wont talk after a while. But lots of men weren’t brought up comfortable talking about money either. If you haven’t talked about it before and suddenly show a huge interest, perhaps he’ll wonder what your sudden motives are. i.e. are you trying to figure out how much he has? I say give it a little time. And, keep your money in your own name. Have a joint account for joint expenses, but keep everything else seperate until you can talk about things openly. My thoughts anyways.
I could not agree more!! This is great advice for all of us, but particularly for those gals who let their husbands take care of their finances. My best friend doesn’t know how much their mortgage is each month. I was shocked when she said that. I can’t talk any sense into her! She’s too busy taking care of her three kids to care. It’s scary.