Is there one soul mate for us out there?

This is something up for debate, clearly… but do we believe that there is one, single person out there who is meant for us?

I don’t. I’ve met the best match possible for my personality and life, and I am not knocking that he is The One (so to speak), but we live in a world of almost 7 billion people.

It just.. cannot be mathematically possible to be in a world of 7 billion people and only be meant for ONE person. At least, not in my mind.

However, other factors come into play at this point. I’d never move to a country out of the blue that didn’t at least speak some half broken English. A lot of countries are cut out at this point. And I also have never travelled extensively around the world, so how can I meet these other people that I click with romantically if I never travel to see them?

So it all boils down to proximity, convenience and luck.

They say that most people end up marrying a person who lived 3 or 4 streets away from them as a kid.

How freaky is that?

But proximity plays a huge role. If you work together, live together, are in the same community, there is a higher chance of clicking with someone in that circle than someone in a community circle in England for example.

Convenience is another factor – what if they lived in another country and you lived here? Would you be just as willing to make it work? Even if they are “The One”?

For me, it takes a while to see if they are the one. Like a month of some intense dating and talking. But if it gets to be too complicated, expensive and stressful, it puts a strain on the relationship.

Luck is the last candy thrown into the mix. It was only by chance that I was put on an out of town project and I traveled to another city where I met BF. We worked for the same company, did the same job, but without having been put on this project — we never would have ever met.

I really don’t believe in a single soul mate. I do however, believe that we have many potential soul mates.

People that we click with to a certain degree and depending on what you’re looking for, you may end up holding out for the one person that fits you 99.9999% or if you’re easy going, settle for someone who makes you happy at around 80%.

Either way is totally, utterly, perfectly FINE. It’s what YOU feel comfortable with and are happy with, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise or make you feel bad for holding out or what they deem to be ‘settling’.

Just because your idea of Mr. Right or Ms. Right doesn’t match your friend’s idea (she may be looking for him to have half a million banked at a young age or something equally rare), does not mean he’s the wrong guy, or she’s the wrong woman for you.

So just how am I coming up with these percentages and how would I calculate how well a person fits with another?

I have no freaking clue.

I do however, know that if the relationship takes a lot of effort in terms of always having to fight or argue over the most mundane things, or if your energy keeps getting drained just trying to keep the relationship alive, then it isn’t worth it.

But if you are in a relationship where he or she understands you, loves you for who you are, and you both are relatively on the same page in terms of Children, Finances, Religion and Politics, then consider yourself one of hte very lucky ones.

You have found each other against all the odds and factors mentioned above.

So. Love, is it a single soul mate that you’re searching for? Or do you feel there are many others out there and it’s just a matter of timing and luck?

About the Author

Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver. I cleared $60,000 in 18 months earning $65,000 gross/year. Now I am self-employed, and you can read more about my story here, or visit my other blog: The Everyday Minimalist.